The dance had finally arrived and Ashleigh wore her hair in tight blonde curls, rather than her straight blonde hair with a pale blue dress, which passed her ankles, Sarah wore a red skimpy dress and Lauren, Ashleigh’s step-sister and date, had her black hair in a French braid and she wore black and blue dress. The gym was decked out in stars and moons and snowflakes and there was a giant tree in the center all colorfully lit up and fake snow lay everywhere. Ashleigh arrived with Lauren, arm in arm wearing huge smiles on their faces. They were gonna have fun with or without Craig.

          Sarah had been watching Craig at the snack stand for twenty minutes while Lauren and Ashleigh were off having a good time. “Craig?” Sarah asked walking up behind him. “What do you want?” he said rolling his eyes. “For you to have a good time.” She said with a smile, “Come on, and dance with me.” She said pulling him out onto the dance floor. Sarah grinded up on him and Craig would refuse pulling away but Ashleigh got the glance when Sarah made him laugh. Furious, Ashleigh rushed to the bathroom. “That fucking jerk!” she said yelling at the top of her lungs. “Ashleigh, look maybe you guys just weren’t meant to be.” Lauren said trying to calm her down. “No not about Craig, about Sarah! How could she do that? She knew Craig meant everything to me, she knew how much I loved him, cared for him, thought about him and she still went and took away the only person that makes me happy, the only person that loves me for me, no strings attached! How could she? And how could he just let her walk all over him that easily? I hate them both!” Ashleigh said on the verge of tears. “I’ll be right back.” Lauren said as she left the bathroom and looked for Craig and Sarah. “What the fuck is your problem, Sarah? Ashleigh’s knows you much better then you’re lead on. And why are you with Ashleigh’s sister, Craig?” she snapped at the, Craig stood there with a blank stare and Sarah stood there with a smile on her face, all she wanted was Craig and that’s what she’s getting. “Don’t you think I should’ve had the right to know?” Craig asked Lauren, “Yeah you would’ve liked it if she hadn’t have told you, wouldn’t you? Then you could go on and live in your little fantasy world. Well maybe you should stop blaming everyone for your own twisted ego.” Lauren said as she rolled her eyes and the two of them and went into the bathroom. Lauren walked into the bathroom and there was no sign of Ashleigh. “Ashleigh?” she called out several times, looking under all the stalls, but no sign of Ashleigh. Lauren rushed back out to Craig and Sarah, “Ashleigh’s gone!”

*        *        *

          Ashleigh ran out of the gym and on her way out the door ran, literally, into Jay. “Yo, you okay?” he asked concerned only had spoken to her a few times. “I need to get out of here, I need to get away.” She said taking a deep breath as she pointed towards the door. Jay looked at Ashleigh and then at the door, “Come with me.”

          “What do you mean she’s gone?” Craig asked confused. “I went into the bathroom and she wasn’t there.” Lauren said panicking. “Well, did she go home?” Sarah asked starting to get worried. “I don’t know, Craig call the house.” Lauren said, “Wait, why do I have to call?” he asked as he started to dial the number into his cell phone. “Because if either me or Sarah call looking for her then they’re gonna get worried.” Lauren said as she started to leave. “Where are you going?” Sarah asked as she followed Lauren, pulling Craig behind her. “To find her!” Lauren said as she walked out of the gym just as Mrs. Hogan answered Craig’s call. “Is Ashleigh there?” he asked trying to act cool. “No she’s not, I’m sorry, you missed her Craig.” She said, “Alright thanks.” He said hanging up the phone as the headed out of Degrassi’s front doors. “Alright she’s not at her house, so where do you suppose we look?” Craig asked as his breath formed a white cloud up against the dark sky. Lauren shrugged her shoulders as she kept walking looking under and around everything.

          Jay escorted Ashleigh to the ravine. “What is this?” she asked laughing as she looked around. “The ravine. You’ve never been?” Jay asked with a smile looking at her. “Nope.” She said nodding her head in agreement as she lifted up her dress so it wouldn’t get dirty. She looked at the other kids drinking and getting high, “What do they have?” she asked with a smile as she used her head to point in the direction of the kids. “They’re probably doing speed or ice or X, the hard stuff.” Jay said checking her out as she watched a kid take a pill. Ashleigh all of a sudden felt vulnerable to having X right before her. “The hard stuff, eh?” she asked. “Well yeah, someone like yourself has never done anything this crazy.” He said laughing. “Oh really? Try two X pills a day?” She said with a smile as she got up and walked over to some guy. She slid her arm down his shoulder and gently brushed her mouth against his neck. “Why don’t you say you give three pills to me and my buddy, Jay?” she said seductively whispering in his ear. Sex is her weapon and she uses it when she knows she might not get what she wants if she asked any other way. “Why don’t you say you and me go hook up in the van, baby?” he asked getting up. Ashleigh smiled and held out her hand waiting for him the place them there. When he finally placed the pills in her hand she smiled at him, “You’ve got deal.” She said as she popped two of the pills in her mouth with a smile. She turned around and headed back over to Jay debating whether or not to give the other pill to Jay or take it. “What’s in the van?” she asked Jay as she sat next to him. “You wanna see?” he asked with a smile. “I’m supposed to go in with that guy.” She said pointing to the kid that gave her the pills. “Well, I could give you the tour.” He said with a smile. Ashleigh looked at him and then at the van as two people got out. “Sure.” She said rolling her eyes. Jay walked towards the van and Ashleigh followed as she swallowed the last pill.

          “You see anything?” Craig asked as they had been looking around for twenty minutes, and no sign of Ashleigh anywhere. “Yeah, black cosmic junk.” Lauren said as she continued to search under and around things. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Sarah asked as she took her shoes off as they started to form blisters on her feet. “It mean’s she’s still out there.” Lauren said. Sarah rolled her eyes and asked to take a break as she took a seat on the bench to message her foot. Sarah sat as Lauren searched around the bench around. “Look, you gotta help me.” Craig said catching up to Lauren. “I don’t have to do anything for you. Besides you’re beyond help.”

“Okay, you don’t like me, fine, I get it. Just tell me what she wants from me. She’s wants me to apologize to her for what? What did I do?”

“It’s what you didn’t do jocko. Accept her for who she is, let her know that her scars are okay with you. We’re all damaged goods here but you’re so wrapped up in yourself that you can’t see anybody else’s damage.”

          “Hey! Hogart!” the kid said running up to Ashleigh and Jay, grabbing her arm as she started to sway. “What do you think you’re doing?” he asked getting up in Jay’s face. “Yo, Alec, come down, I was just about to give her the tour.” Jay said with a smile as he pointed to the van. “That was my job you moron.” Alec said snapping in Jay’s face as he pinched Ashleigh’s arm and pulled her towards the van. Ashleigh looked back at Jay and grinned as Alec opened the door into the van. “Ladies first.” Alec said motioning his hand towards the van, Ashleigh looked at Alec smiled and tripped her way into the van. She laughed at the van in disgust as it started to spin. Alec followed behind her, closing the doors, he then grabbed her arm and turned her around planting a kiss on her lips. Ashleigh pulled away as she started to get dizzy and hot, “No, stop I don’t feel good.” She said pushing him away. Alec refused and pushed himself towards Ashleigh as she tried all she could to push him away, he planted another kiss on her lips, “I said no!” she said slurring as she pushed him to the floor. Jay heard her yell and looked towards the van and laughed as he opened another can of beer. “Yo lady.” He said getting up and trying to hold on to her again. She tried her best to push him away as her vision started to sway and spin and she couldn’t keep focus on one thing, she started feeling very light headed and dizzy. “Alec, stop.” She tried to get out of her mouth before he pinned her up against the side of the car and started necking her. Ashleigh’s temperature started to rise as she tried to put the swaying pieces together and figure out exactly where she was. She started feeling hot and sweaty as Alec dragged his hand down the back of her dress un-zippering it. Alec pulled her sleeves over her shoulders as Ashleigh started to loose her balance, she herself started to sway lightly back and fourth as she tried to catch her breath. Ashleigh tried to figure out where she was when her world went black.

          Ashleigh couldn’t see anything but she -could hear fine, she heard her bodies thud hit the floor and Alec trying to ask her what happened and even though she thought she was answering back, she wasn’t. Alec freaked and opened the door and screamed for help. “Somebody call 911!” he said, everyone turned around and faced the van; Jay immediately knew that it was Ashleigh. “Shit.” He said as he started running towards the van. “What happened?” he asked getting in the van. “I don’t know, we were hanging out and she just collapsed.” He said freaking out as he stepped out of the van. Jay handed Alec his cell phone and told Alec to call the cops as Jay tried to put Ashleigh’s dress back on. “How many pills did you give her?” Jay asked with Ashleigh in his arms to hold her up. “Uh, either two for her or two for you and either one for you or one for her.” Alec said trying to make sense of what he just said as he tried to catch his breath from the nervousness about the cops finding her. “You gave her three?” Jay snapped back. “Yeah, she said some was for you.” Alec said, “Okay, Alec you never ever give them more than two even if they say it’s for their friend, the friend has to be there to back it up.” Jay said as his pupils shrunk, knowing that if she had taken in three ecstasy pills, she could very well be fighting for her life, unconscious.

          Lauren, Craig and Sarah threw their heads back with a moan as they took a seat at a bus stop. “We’ve been looking for her for two hours, where the hell could she have possibly gone?” Sarah asked rolling her eyes as she messaged her feet again. “Craig, try the house again.” Lauren said as she rested her head on the glass. Just as Craig was dialing Ashleigh’s number an ambulance drove by and they were able to hear the call. White/Caucasian, Female, Age 16, found overdosed at the ravine, they heard from outside the ambulance and everyone looked at one another as they could feel their stomach turn and their breath shorten. In unison, they jumped off the bench and ran after the ambulance, following it to the ravine.

          When Lauren, Craig and Sarah arrived at the ravine they saw Ashleigh, on the gurney, get pulled into the back of the ambulance. All their faces lost all color as they watched Ashleigh’s lifeless body get helped into the ambulance. Their stomach’s turned, their hearts dropped and they couldn’t speak or move, they just watched. The EMT’s slammed the doors closed and walked over to the front of the ambulance and piled into the van. All of which seemed to be moving in slow motion for Craig, Lauren and Sarah as they watched the ambulance drive off. As the ambulance was no longer in clear view, Lauren started to bawl in fear of Ashleigh not making it knowing of what Ashleigh is, or maybe was, capable off. Sarah’s tears came slowly as she had to process the scene in her brain and Craig just stood there stunned as Jay headed over. “Hey she was you’re ex right?” Jay asked Craig, Craig nodded yes and Jay patted his arm, “Sorry man.” Jay said walking away. Lauren grew more tears thinking that Ashleigh didn’t make it and placed her head on Craig’s shoulder to keep herself up as she felt as though she was going to faint, she couldn’t believe that drugs is what Ashleigh reduced her life to.