Ellie woke to the sound of her alarm.  Her alarm wasn’t a clock; it was her two year old son. 

“Mama,” he called out to her from his room.

Ellie smiled at the small sweet voice.

“Mama it’s not dark anymore,” he said, meaning it was time to get up.

Ellie looked at the clock 6:03. Damn why can’t that kid ever sleep in, she thought rolling over to get up and start her day. 

Ellie knew if she didn’t get Aidan soon he would wake Marco up and no one would be happy about that. 

Ellie made her way down the hall to the door of Aidan’s room.  When she stepped inside she was greeted with a huge grin.  The same grin waited for her each morning.  Aidan had grown so much since they moved in with Marco five months ago.  The more he grew the more you saw Sean in him.  Everyone saw it.  He was his father made over.  The only thing it seemed Ellie had supplied, besides the home for nine months, was the red hair.  Aidan had Sean’s eyes, nose, mouth, dimples and even the same curly locks but instead of a dark blonde they were the same red as Ellie’s.

Ellie reached out to the boy standing in the crib and he wrapped his little arms around her neck and started to twirl her hair around his fingers.  Something he had been doing as long as Ellie could remember.  He liked to twist his chubby little fingers up in her hair to go to sleep.  Marco would laugh as she would struggle to untangle Aidan’s fingers to lay him in bed at night.  More than once Marco had to help her. 

Ellie’s life was going well right now.  She and Marco found a place to share just like they had planned, but instead of a two bedroom they needed a three.  Marco was a bit of a stand in dad for Aidan.  He and Ellie had made sure to pick classes so that one of them would be able to get Aidan from daycare and home by 4:00 everyday.  Neither of them wanted him to have to spend most of his day with someone else. 

Ellie’s parents were always willing to help with Aidan if both Ellie and Marco had to work or just needed a break.  But Mr. and Mrs. Nash spent a lot of time traveling these days.  Mrs. Nash told Ellie: “We are just getting to know each other again”.  Ellie figured that made sense when her dad had been away for years and when he finally came home it was to a pregnant teenage daughter and soon a grandbaby.  Mrs. Nash seemed to be back to the person Ellie remembered before her dad left the first time.  And now that her dad had retired from the military Ellie’s worry for her mother was gone.

Most of Ellie’s friends from Degrassi stayed close by.  Craig was at the same university as Ellie and Marco.  Music is still the biggest part of his life and amazingly, although he is around other great musicians all the time in his classes, he still wants his same friends to play with him.  Ellie even joined back up after a four month break, so now Downtown Sasquatch is back playing around Toronto.  Paige got into Banting but turned it down to go to U of T with Craig much to the shock of her parents.  Jimmy’s also with them.  He and Hazel ended it but still talk all the time and everyone can see they love each other but neither want to admit it first.  Hazel went to NYU and is always sending Paige some of her designs, which are unreal. 

Ava turned out to be the one to surprise Ellie the most.  She continued to push Tucker away and is now dating Jay.  Living with him actually, and with all the money she saved, that her father sent, she opened up a boutique and bypassed college altogether.  Ellie had lunch with her yesterday before she left for New York to shop for her store.

Jay and Ellie are not the best of friends; he can’t get around his thoughts that Sean should know he has a mini me running around Toronto but for Ava he keeps it to himself.  Jay made a lot of changes for Ava which is a surprise to everyone who knows him.

The only thing Ellie has stress over is Cameron.  He still visits on school breaks but Ellie never lets herself get too close to him.  Not that it deters him; he still comes begging Ellie for something she can’t give him.  Not yet.  But last night after talking to Cam, after him telling her how much he loves her, she felt herself starting to give in.  He doesn’t make her knees weak but he is a good person.  He has never pushed her about sex in the two years they have known each other and Ellie has still only given herself to Sean.  Yet he still calls, he still spends his money to visit and sends both her and Aidan gifts. 

Last night after Ellie hung up she lay awake thinking. It’s time, it’s time to let Sean go and stop waiting for him to show up here and make us a family.  It isn’t going to happen and it’s time to move on, she told herself before giving in to sleep.

This morning it was the first thing she thought.  Sean can no longer be part of my thoughts.  He’s gone.  There it’s been done. She has made her decision.  She is letting go of the boy she loved since she was 15 and moving on.

Ellie’s day was in full swing: Aidan sitting in his highchair eating oatmeal as she put the finishing touches on a piece for the campus paper when the phone rang. 

“Hello,” she answered.

And with that one word her world was again turned upside down.