Chapter Six

Sean and Emma

Sean walked through the door first since the doctor only allowed one person at a time to visit her. Emma was on the bed with wraps on her arms. You could see a lot of blood running through the wraps though. Jay looked through the window at Emma. "Sean! Hey!" Sean walked up and sat down next to Emma. "Hey.” "What’s wrong?" she asked. "Just looking at you...you don’t look to good". Emma rolled her eyes at Sean and started laughing. Sean tried to smile but some tears fell from his eyes. Emma looked at Sean and stopped smiling. "What’s wrong?" "Emma! You’re in the hospital! That’s what’s wrong." Sean stood up and tried looking down at Emma but he put his hand over his mouth to stop crying so much. "I would get up and help you...but I’m not aloud to walk.” This didn’t help Sean that much. He sat back on the ground and started crying more. Emma looked around to see there was no nurse’s or doctors. So she stood up and walked over to Sean. She sat next to him and looked over at him. She smiled and Sean looked at her. She wiped some tears off of his face and gave him a hug. He kept crying in her shoulder. "Sh ... it'll be okay Sean." "You could die Emma! The doctors told me!" "I'll be fine. Don’t worry about me." Emma didn’t know if she was going to be fine or not but it seemed like the right thing to say at the time.

Jay and Emma

When Sean left Jay didn’t even look at Sean. He walked into Emma's room as fast as he could. Right when Jay got in there he cried and gave Emma a huge hug. "Are you feeling okay? I mean look at you." he said. Emma smiled at him. "I’m fine." "Are you sure?" "I’m sure." "Do you need anything?" Emma laughed at him. And Jay gave her a worried-like smile. "It’s not funny Emma." "It’s a little funny." "Emma, I’ve only cried two times in my whole life, and that’s when my parents divorced and my older brother died. I only cry when I’m really upset." Emma hugged him again and he started crying in her shoulder. Jay got back and moved the hair out of her face he put his head to hers and kissed her on her lips. She kissed him back and he hugged her again. A doctor walked in the room. "Excuse me ser." "What?" Jay sounded pissed because he just wanted to stay with Emma. "Visiting hours are over in a few minutes.” The doctor left and Jay looked back at Emma. Emma kissed him and then he kissed her again and again. Jay wiped his face off from the tears his eyes couldn’t keep in. Then he stood up and walked out of the room, but before he left he said goodnight.

Sean and Jay

Right when Jay got out of Emma's room Sean looked at him worried. "Are you okay Man?" “I’m fine!!” Jay snapped. "Let’s just get to the car okay Cameron?" "Sure.” When they got into the car Sean realized something different from when they both went to visit Emma. When he walked in he didn’t start crying and hugging her until a little while after and Jay did it right when he saw her. And he was crying the whole time. Sean wasn’t. Maybe Emma was for Jay. Maybe Emma and Sean were meant to be over.

Chapter Seven

Jay and Sean

In the car it was completely quiet. Sean tried to break the silence. "So, how are you?" "Don’t give me that crap Cameron. You know dam well how I am doing right now." "I’m sorry?"

Sean and Ellie

The next day was Saturday and the doorbell rang. Sean went to get it and when he opened it he was shocked to see Ellie. "Ellie… What are you doing here?" "I came to see how you were." "What do you mean?" "Emma's mom told Joey, and Joe told Craig, and Craig told Ashley. Then Ashley told me about Emma. Is that why you wanted to know about cutting?" Sean stood there for a few moments not saying anything. "Yeah that’s why I wanted to know about cutting." "Why didn’t you tell me you knew? I could have gotten her into my group, got her a counselor there or something. Plus it’s confidential. Her parents wouldn’t even have found out if she didn’t want them to know.” Sean started crying. "Yeah I know and it’s my fault!!" "What do you mean?" "I knew she cut and I didn’t tell anybody. Now she is in the hospital. " Ellie hugged Sean and he pushed her away. "Um I should be alone right now." "Are you sure?" "I’m sure. Thanks though." "No problem.” Ellie turned and left and after she passed the wood fence he shut the door. Then he leaned up against the wall and slid down.

 Emma and Jay

Jay came to visit Emma and when he walked through the door she got out of bed so fast and ran to him. She hugged him and he grabbed onto her waist. "You know you should probably stay in bed." "Why?" "The doctors said so." Emma wouldn’t let go of him. She buried her face in his shoulder and smelled his cologne, which she missed. Since she wouldn’t let go of him he picked her and put her in bed. He lied down next to her and her legs were on top of his. "You know if the nurse comes in here we are dead." "I don’t care. I tried coming to visit you again last night but with the visiting hours thing, and I couldn’t find a brick.” Emma laughed to this and he smiled. "Emma, do you like Sean?" "Of course I like Sean. I love Sean." "You do?" "Yes, he's one of my best friends." "You mean you love him just as a friend?" “That’s what I just said." Jay smiled and kissed her. Emma smiled back.

Jay’s Thoughts

Sean and Emma... totally sitting in a tree. I love Emma so much. But I know she is lying to me. I won’t be able to be there for her. I’m not that kind of guy. Sean is. He's the one that Emma needs right now. I can’t be there for her all the time. I have my own life. Unlike Sean I don’t think only about my girlfriend. I mean I love her to death; I'd to anything for her. I guess that’s kind of why I’m thinking about doing this. I’m going to have to break up with her once she gets out of this place. It’s would be for her own good. This way she won’t cut.

Jay and Emma

Jay walked to his locker with his headphones on. He was kind of head banging and singing. Really getting into the music he was listening too, that is until someone's hands were over his eyes. He didn’t hear them say "guess who?" because of his headphones. "Alex! Knock it off!" he ripped the hands off of his face and saw Emma. She was smiling and laughing hello. "I’m not Alex." She got out surprisingly out of her laughter. Jay was happy to see she was okay. But he knew he had to break up with her now. "Hey Emma...how are you feeling?" He smiled a little but had a plain tone. "I’m okay. A lot better actually. I just have to wear these wraps around my arms for about six months or so. But I get out of P.E." "Oh, that’s good. I know that’s your worst subject." "Yeah it is. Jay are you okay?" "Emma....I think we should break up." Jay spit the words out of his mouth. ”What? Why do you want to break up?" "Sean seems so perfect for you .and I don’t think I’m ever going to be that." "Well if that’s how you feel.” "You’re just going to let it go like that Emma?" "What else am I supposed to do? I love you. And there’s nothing I can do." "I love you too, but I am not the guy for you. I never can be." "If that’s what you believe then I guess we’re over. Once Emma was out of sight, Jay slowly slid down from his locker to the ground and starting sobbing.

Sean and Emma

Sean noticed Emma in the hallway and ran up to her. "Emma, what’s wrong?" She was crying. "Nothing’s wrong. Anyways, what’s up?" "I can’t believe they let you out so early." "Yeah me either." "Are you sure you’re okay?" "Look Sean, can you do me a huge favor?" "Yeah, of course I can. What is it?" "Just leave me alone for a little while.” Sean’s face gave it away that he was in complete shock. Emma just told him to leave her alone. After he told her he cared.

Chapter Eight

Sean’s Thoughts

She hates me. She thinks it’s my fault that she was in the hospital. That’s why she wants me to leave her alone, I’m not stupid. Then again, Jay could have talked her into it or something. She told me not to tell anyone and I didn’t, even though I should have. I cared enough I would have told somebody. What’s wrong with me?

Emma's Thoughts

I really messed things up this time with Jay and Sean. Sean obviously told Jay I started cutting because of him and that's probably why he broke up with me. Just because Sean leaving was why I started doesn't mean I still like him does it? He saved my life and I was so grateful for it but then he left for Wasaga. Everyday after he left it seemed like something bad was going to happen to me because he wasn't there to protect me. That was why I started to cut and burn myself - in some ways it made me feel "safe" I guess.

Sean Calls Emma

Emma was just about to go to sleep when her phone rang. "Hello?" Emma knew who was on the other line and even though she told him to leave her alone for a while she wanted to talk to him. "Emma look I know you told me to leave you alone for a while but I just can't. I feel so guilty because you ended up in the hospital and that's my fault. I could have told someone even if in the end you ended up hating me because see Emma you hating me isn't the worst thing that could happen to me. Yeah it would suck but I dealt with it before... If you had had to stay in the hospital longer or..." Sean took a deep breath for what he was about to say would only make him want to cry. "Or you winding up dead is worse than you hating me." He was crying by the time he wad finished saying this. Emma was in shock, she knew he cared about her but she didn't know it was that much. "Sean..." She started to say "Sean it's not your fault so stop feeling guilty. I could have done something else besides cutting and burning myself. If anyone's fault it's mine." There was a long pause before Emma spoke. "Sean I know me and Jay just broke up and he would probably kill you if you skipped school tomorrow to hang out with me but will you please?" He was shocked by what he just heard. Emma Nelson wanted to skip school and be with him. She had done this once or twice before but that was to find her dad and this was way different. "Are you sure you want to skip and spend the day with me?" She took a quick pause before she spoke again. "Yes Sean I'm sure." "Okay then I will meet you tomorrow at your house say around eight?" "Yeah sounds good but come through the basement window." "Sure. Well bye Emma." "Wait!!" Emma yelled loud enough for anyone in the basement to hear but quiet enough so she wouldn't wake anyone. "Yes?" "Sean I-" She couldn't finish her sentence. "Emma, you what?" "I, well I oh never mind it's (pause) it's nothing. Bye."

Chapter Nine

Emma and Her Mom

Emma honey, get up or you are going to be late." Her mom yelled down to her. "Mom please come here." Her mom walked down the stairs wondering what he daughter could possibly need her to come down there for. "Mom I know I shouldn't be asking this but I have had a rough last couple of weeks so I was wondering if I could stay home. Sean is going to come over around eight or so if you don't mind because we need to talk." Her mom took a long pause before saying…"Alright that's fine but I will call Snake and tell him to bring home what you missed today okay honey?" "Yes mom. Thanks."

Emma's mom left her room and she quickly got up. It was Sean and she knew he didn't care what she looked like but today she wanted things to be a little different. She went to her closet and picked out a black denim mini skirt with a white top that had red cursive writing on it along with a pair of black sandals. Then she put on some mascara and a little lip gloss. She wanted to look good but not like she was trying to impress him. Then she went upstairs to call Sean. She told him that he didn't have to go through her basement window anymore. After she hung up she went outside to wait for him. Of course she knew he was going to be late. He usually was for almost everything. About 20 minutes after eight he showed up.

Sean and Emma

"Sean!!" Emma was so happy to see him and Sean couldn't believe how happy she seemed. He thought for a moment about how he hadn't seen Emma this happy since their first kiss. "Hey Emma, so you wanted to talk?" "Yeah but I don't want to talk at my house. Let’s go to the park or something." "Sure sounds good." They were walking really close to each other and a few times their hands brushed against one another. Basically the whole walk to the park was quiet but it was just down the street so it wasn't that long of a silence. "Well we are here Emma so what on earth was so important for you and me to talk about that we couldn't do it at school or on the phone last night?" Sean made a weird face because he didn't mean for it to sound mean. "Fine Sean be like that. You didn't have to come but I thought we could just talk." Emma snapped. "Be like what Emma? (Long pause) Be like what Emma, sulky? Is that all you see in me? A sulky bad ass that always gets into trouble and likes steeling things from the school because I am not like that anymore!!" He was mad at himself for bringing up the word "sulky" it reminded him of yet another terrible day they broke up and/or fought on. Emma was about to walk away when Sean grabbed her arm. "Emma no I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that, it's just I don't see why we couldn't have done this at school or something." "No Sean don't be sorry, it's my fault. I kind of got mad at you for saying that. And yeah you are right we could have done this at school but with everything that's going on and then the whole Jay thing. Jay wouldn't be too happy if he saw us talking."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Emma spoke. "Sean the real reason I wanted you to come here with me was because it's you. I mean we have been through so much together, everything from you pushing me and us getting back together to you steeling Snake's laptop and then you saving me. If you hadn't stopped Rick and done what you did I probably wouldn't be here right now." Emma started to cry. "Don't cry Emma. You are a wonderful girl and I am so happy that we are friends again. Rick was just screwed up and he obviously didn't see what I see in you. Now I don't know what you wanted to talk about today but I am always here for you. But I do have a feeling that it has to do with maybe me or Jay?" "Thanks and yeah it has to do with you. When Jay said I still liked you or at least that's what he thought I was so angry. I mean I loved Jay or I thought I did anyway but my point is it got me thinking. You were my first love and this is the first time I think I have ever told anyone besides Manny." She was stunned at what had just come out of her mouth but not as much as him. "Emma you were my first love too and I thought I could never love anyone as much as you and then there was Ellie. Sure I liked her and I asked her to live with me but I realized when I left that I didn't love her like I loved you. I have never told anyone this but when I saw Jay's car leave I started to cry and I realized a few weeks later that I was crying because I was afraid that I would never see you again because something like that could happen again but this time I wouldn't be there to protect you." "Aw Sean I don't know how we lasted this long apart!!" Emma and Sean both leaned in slowly until their heads were together kind of like how their first kiss happened. Then they kissed. it was the most passionate kiss either of them had ever experienced.

They talked more after that. Mostly about random things like how Wasaga was and anything they could think of basically. It was getting late and they had to get going. Sean walked Emma home and before she went inside Sean leaned in and kissed her for a quick second then on her way inside she turned around and said "Sean I think I love you ... Again." "Emma I have always loved you." Sean said with a big smile on his face. Then she went inside and Sean went home.

Inside Emma's House

She saw a note on the kitchen table and it read

Emma, Snake and I went away for the weekend.
Baby Jack is at Joey's and if you need anything you
can call us at (541) 972 - 5084

Then she walked over to the phone and was about to call her mom and see how things were going when she saw a message. She listened to it and it was Jay. Since her parents weren't home she decided to call him instead and invite him over. He was a little confused as to why she called him back but then again it was even weirder because he broke up with her and yet he called her.

In no time Jay was at her house. "Emma I am so sorry. Sorry for everything. I realized the other day when you gave me the CD back how much I really love you." His words were rushed out but she could clearly understand him. "Jay ... Jay I don't know what to say but I think you should sit down for this." "Okay?" He was confused but sat down anyways. "Jay today I asked my mom if I could skip school and she was okay with it. I asked Sean if he would ditch with me. He said sure and so we hung out for the whole day at the park just talking about a bunch of things. He told me he loved me and we had some serious conversation before we..." She couldn't figure out how to say it but Jay finished her sentence for her. "Before you what Emma? Kissed him?" "Well yeah … a few times. But Jay-" "No Emma it's fine, really, but just tell me one thing" "What is it?" "Do you still like I mean you know ... want to be with me?" There was long pause before she answered. "Jay I still do. Yes!!" Then she leaned in and kissed him. They were kissing for a while until the phone rang. "Do you want to get that?" He asked. "No just leave it." Then they went on kissing and Jay went up her shirt. After that he took off her shirt and she did the same. He was surprised that she didn't stop him. She got up to turn off the lights put on some soft music to play in the background. "Are you sure you want to do this Emma?" "Yeah I am sure now shut up and kiss me!!" He obeyed her and before she could realize what was going on all their clothes were off. Here it goes Jay was saying in his head.

Saturday

Emma woke up and saw that Jay was with her. They were wrapped in each others arms with some blankets covering them. She woke him up and told him that Manny was supposed to come over in a few hours and that she needed to take a shower and clean the house. He told her to go take a shower while he got ready. She was out of the shower just in time because he was on his way out the door. He gave her a quick kiss goodbye and then left. Emma was just standing there, her hair soaked and wrapped in just a towel smiling the biggest smile you could imagine. She got ready and then remembered that someone had called the night before. She went over to see who it was. It was Sean and the message he left made her feel so guilty.

Chapter Ten

Sean's Message

"Okay well guess you're not there Em. Anyways, I just called to say I had a great time with you today at the park and I am in a way glad that you and Jay broke up. Deep down I really thought you still liked me but I wasn't just going to say that allowed, especially to Jay. Don't tell him I am glad though. Um are we together again or something? Well it's really late and I need to sleep so I’ll call you tomorrow morning - maybe we can hang out or something? I love you Em and I don't want to lose you ever again." He blew a kiss sound into the phone. "Bye."

Emma quickly got dressed into whatever she could find and hurried over to Sean's apartment. Even though she had told Jay the night before about how Sean and she had kissed she figured since it was Jay in all that Sean would be the first person to know about what happened last night. She couldn't let that happen... if he absolutely needed to know then it should be her that tells him. She got over to Sean's and saw Jay's car. She thought it would be best to wait until Jay left before she went inside to talk to him.

Jay and Sean

There was a knock on Sean's door which he awoke too. He walked over to the door and opened it. There he saw a very happy Jay. "Jay, hey man. What's up?" "Nothing, but…" "What?" "Well me and Emma, you know we-" "What!? You and Emma? I thought there was no more you and Emma?" Sean couldn't believe what he was hearing. There was still an Emma and Jay thing going on and to think of everything she and he had talked about the day before. "Haha. .. There is a me and Emma now. I went over to her place last night. Actually I left her a message and she called me back and invited me over since her parents are gone for the weekend." "Oh." Sean said in a sad voice. "Well what did you and Emma do or whatever?" He asked afraid to know the answer. "We you know..." "No I don't know Jay so tell me!!" He lied. He knew what they did but he wanted to hear him say it. "We had sex. Aw man that feels so good to say. It was the best timing ever. I mean there was no one home and no interruptions except some phone call but she didn't pick it up and she had the lights dimmed and soft music playing in the background." Sean let out a weak "Oh." like his heart had just been taken out and stomped on a million times. ”Well man I need to clean this place up so if you don't mind -" "Oh, yeah no problem. I will talk to you later though... maybe give you all the details if you know what I mean!!" Jay let out a little laugh and left with a big smile on his face. Sean on the other hand was so depressed. He told Emma things and after everything they talked about the other day she went home to have sex with his best friend. Who does that?