Degrassi Freak Fiction

510 The Way I Am (Part One)

Matt's back to hiding things from Paige. More seriously, Marco is finding it impossible to hide his biggest secret from his father.

[In a restaurant...]

(Marco and his parents are sitting in a restaurant, eating dinner...)

Marco-  So, his face is like beat red, right?  (Laughing.)  So, then, I...then I turn towards Craig, and I tell him that that wasn't spaghetti.  (Marco's mom is laughing.  Marco's dad doesn't say anything.)  You didn't think that was funny papa?

Marco's dad-  Excuse me for one minute.  (He stands up and leaves the table.)

Marco's mom-  I thought that was funny.

Marco-  Thanks.

Marco's mom-  You have some good friends.  (Marco nods.)  How about boyfriends?  You haven't dated since Dylan, have you?

Marco-  Ma, he's on the other side of the room, he didn't leave the country.

Marco's mom-  You deserve to be happy.  I just want that.  How are you going to be happy, if you're not dating anyone?

Marco-  I'm just not ready yet.

Marco's mom-  You and Dylan broke up almost a year ago.  It's time for you to move on.

Marco-  Dylan was a big part of my life.  And...and...and... Pa's coming back.  Can we not talk about this?  (Marco's mom nods.  Marco's dad sits down.)

Marco's dad-  Well Marco, I have a surprise for you.

Marco-  You do?

Marco's dad-  Yeah.  Misha?  (A girl walks over to the table.)  Here's your date.  (Marco looks terrified.)




[At Marco's house...]

(Marco and his parents get out of the car...)

Marco's dad-  He's always saying he never has time to date, so I thought I'd bring the date to him.  What's bad?

Marco's mom-  When you were Marco's age, did you ever want to go on a date with your parents?

Marco's dad-  No.  But when I was Marco's age, I didn't have trouble meeting girls.

Marco-  Can we just drop it, please?

Marco's dad-  We'll find you someone.

Marco-  I have no doubt you'll try.

Marco's dad-  That a boy.  (He pats Marco on the back.  Marco turns his head towards the street and sees Dylan.  Dylan waves.  Marco looks shocked.  Marco's dad looks at what Marco's looking at and sees Dylan.)  Dylan.  Hey.  (He walks over to him.  He shakes his hand.)  How have you been?  I haven't seen you around lately.

Dylan-  Good to see you too, Mr. Del Rossi.

Marco-  Pa, can I talk to Dylan alone for a minute?

Marco's dad-  Sure. (He starts to head back into the house, but turns around and stops.)  You should come around more often Dylan.  Help Marco find a girlfriend.  (Marco's mom grabs Marco's dad's arm and leads him back into the house.)

Marco-  What are you doing here?

Dylan-  It's winter break.  I'm visiting my parents on holiday.  They live a block away.  I thought I'd take a walk around the neighbourhood to see if anything changed.  (Pauses.)  Looks to me that things haven't really changed around here.

Marco-  I just haven't found the right time to tell him.

Dylan-  i figured just as much.  You have no reason to tell him, do you?

Marco-  That's none of your business.  Why do you even care?  Why are you even here?  Did you come here to rub your wonderful college life in my face?  Tell me how many guys you've hooked up with?  How wonderful it is to be single again?  Because let me tell you, I've been having a great time being single too.  The freedom that being single gives you.  It's really rewarding, you know?  You get to meet so many new people, and do so many new things.  Things that you wouldn't let me, maybe?

Dylan-  Marco, stop being petty.

Marco-  You're not going to tell me what to do Dylan.  (Starts to tear up.)  Not anymore.  You've been running my life for too long now, and I'm stopping it right now.  (Marco heads towards the door)

Dylan-  Marco, stop.  (Marco stops, and turns around.  He tries to hold back the tears.)

Marco-  Why Dylan?  Why should I?  (The door opens behind him.)

Dylan-  Because I made a huge mistake.  I still love you.  (Marco looks shocked.  He doesn't move.)  I always have.   I was an idiot for dumping you.  What was I thinking?  I'm never going to find someone like you.  Anyone like you.  I miss you.  I love you.

Marco-  I need to go.

Dylan-  Marco, please...

Marco-  I need to go.  (Marco turns around and heads towards the door.  He sees his father standing in the doorway.)

Marco's dad-  We need to talk.


[At Paige's house...]

(Paige and Matt are sitting in Paige's room, making out when Matt's cell phone rings.)

Paige-  Can you just ignore it?

Matt-  It might be Charlie.

Paige-  So?  It's not like she's going into labor yet.

Matt-  You never know.  (He grabs his phone.)  Hello?  (Paige lays down on the bed.)  Yeah.  (Pauses.)  I'm with her right now.  (Pauses.)  Sort of.  (Pauses.)  Alright.  Bye.

Paige-  Charlie?

Matt-  Charlie.

Paige-  Every time you're in town, you spend most of your time with her.  The time you're not with her, she's on your phone.  I know she's pregnant, and you want to help her, but can't you just tell her to not call unless it's an emergency or something?

Matt-  I did.  I do.  But, she's lonely and scared.  She doesn't have anyone to turn to. 

Paige-  I know.  I know.  So, what if we spent time where she couldn't interrupt us.

Matt-  What do you mean?

Paige-  What about if I came up to visit you?

Matt-  Paige...

Paige-  Come on...It could be fun.  I have winter break coming up.  We could spend the week together or something.  I could come up there.  We could see the sites.  Spend time together.  Alone.  In your apartment.  No parents, brothers, or Charlie.  No interruptions.  Just peace and quiet.  (She kisses him softly.)

Matt-  It's a 20 hour drive.

Paige-  I'll fly.

Matt-  It costs an arm and a leg.

Paige-  I have a job.  I'm almost done paying off Spinner's car.  And I've been saving up a little bit on the side for a rainy day.  I'm sure I have enough.  You can afford it.

Matt-  That's only because Charlie's parents pay for it.

Paige-  What?

Matt-  I mean...

Paige-  I thought that Charlie's parents weren't involved with her anymore.  I thought they disowned her because she slept with random guys.  I thought...

Matt-  They did do all of that stuff.

Paige-  Then why are they paying for you to fly out here to help her?  If they are helping you help her, why not cut out the middle man?  Why not just help her themselves?

Matt-  I don't know.  They're rich and they're crazy.  How am I suppose to know what goes through their crazy heads?

Paige-  Matt, you're lying to me.

Matt-  I'm not lying to you.

Paige-  This doesn't add up.  Explain to me why I should believe you.

Matt-  Paige, don't get jealous.

Paige-  Don't give me a reason to be jealous, Matt.

Matt- Charlie's parents disowned her.  She was devastated.  So, she called me, and told me everything.  I told her that whatever I could do to help her, I would.

Paige-  And that's suppose to make me jealous?

Matt-  When Charlie heard that, she told her parents that I would help her, and they asked if I was the father.  She told them yes.

Paige-  She told them you were the kid's father?  (Matt nods.)  Are you?

Matt-  No.

Paige-  Why did you keep that from me?  Why would you lie?

Matt-  Because I wanted to keep seeing you.  I wanted you to keep being my girlfriend.  And instead of coming clean with Charlie's parents, I wanted to keep seeing you, and that meant flying here with money I don't have.  And they do.  So, I kept up the lie and I kept seeing you.  I didn't want to explain to you this increasingly complicated situation because I didn't want to lose you.

Paige-  You could have told me.

Matt-  You freaked out Paige.

Paige-  Because you kept it from me for so long.  What else are you keeping from me?

Matt-  Nothing Paige.  I swear to you.  (He kisses her.)  I love you, and only you.  You're the girl for me.  (Paige kisses him.)

Paige-  So, how much does a trip to the Yukon cost?

Matt-  Too much.  (They chuckle a little and begin to make out again.)


[At Marco's house...]

(Marco is sitting in his room.  His mother is sitting next to him, rubbing his arm.  His father is pacing the floor...)

Marco's dad-  Do you want to explain to me what happened out there?

Marco-  No.

Marco's dad-  So, that was nothing?

Marco-  No.

Marco's mom-  I don't think Marco is ready to talk yet.

Marco's dad-  He's going to talk.  He's going to talk, and he's going to tell me everything.

Marco's mom-  Let him talk when he's ready.

Marco-  Ma, I got this.  (Marco's mom nods.)  Papa, it was what it was.  Dylan told me he loved me.  Because he did.

Marco's dad-  (Starts to tear up.)  Like...Like a friend?

Marco-  No papa.  Like a boyfriend.

Marco's dad-  Like a boyfriend?

Marco-  Yes.

Marco's dad-  Like a boyfriend?  (Marco nods.)  So, he was your boyfriend?  (Marco sits still for a moment.)  Was he?  (Marco nods sheepishly.)  No.  No!

Marco's mom-  Please.  Calm down.  It's not that bad.

Marco's dad-  What do you mean "It's not that bad"?  You're son is gay.  He's a limp-wristed, interior-decorating, make-up wearing boy. 

Marco's mom-  I know.

Marco's dad-  You know?  (Pauses.)  You knew?

Marco's mom-  Yes.  We didn't know how you would take it.

Marco's dad-  You knew?  (He shakes his head.)  My own wife.  Betrays me.

Marco-  She didn't betray you.

Marco's dad-  What are you doing?  Why are you talking?  You're dead to me.

Marco-  (He stands up.)  What?

Marco's mom-  He's your only son.

Marco's dad-  My son?  My son wouldn't betray me.

Marco-  Papa.

Marco's dad-  My son wouldn't refuse to provide someone to carry on the family name.  The Del Rossi men are men of pride and integrity.  We get the best women, and we are men among men.

Marco-  I'm still a man.

Marco's dad-  No.  No gay is a man.  You're not a woman, but you sure aren't a man.

Marco's mom-  He is a man.  He's courageous, and he's kind, and he's more of a man than you'll ever be.  Any man would be proud to call him their son.

Marco's dad-  I have no son.  (He leaves the room.  Marco follows him out of the room.)

Marco-  I may like other men, but that does not give you the right to disown me.

Marco's dad-  Yes it does.

Marco-  Why?  So what?  It happens.  I can't help it.  It's who I am.

Marco's dad-  No.  I doesn't just happen.  That's not who you are.  Who you were was my son.  My only son.  The man to carry on the family name and business.  Who's going to respect a gay?  No one.  That's who.  (He sits down on a chair.  He puts his hand to his face and starts to weep silently.)

Marco-  Papa.  I'm still me.  I'm still Marco.  I'm still your boy.  My favorite color is still blue.  I still think Mama's pasta is the best on the planet.  Nothing changed.

Marco's dad-  I want you to move your things out of your room.

Marco-  What?

Marco's dad-  I'm not housing any gay.  This isn't a gay house.  There is no such thing as gays.

Marco-  Papa...(He starts to tear up.)  How can you say that?  I'm still your boy.  I'm still your boy.

Marco's dad-  You've disgraced me and the family.  If you stay gay, you will be dead to me.

Marco-  It's not a choice.  Why would I choose this?

Marco's dad-  Because you're sick.  You're sick in the head.  (He starts to shake his head.)  It's not natural.  The Bible says so.

Marco-  I...What...I...

Marco's dad-  Why can't you just like girls?  (He gets up and leaves the room.  Marco tears up.)

Marco's mom-  (From upstairs.)  Marco?  (Marco leaves the house.)


[The next day at school...]

(Craig, Hazel, Jimmy, and Hazel are walking down the hall together...)

Craig-  I cannot wait for midterms to be over. 

Jimmy-  I swear, this semester is a killer.

Hazel-  Totally.  There is no way University is this hard.  (Paige is just staring off in to space.) 

Paige?  Earth to Paige?

Paige-  Huh?

Craig-  It's the tests.  They've gotten to her.

Hazel-  What's going on with you?

Paige-  What do you mean?

Hazel-  You've barely said two words today.  Something wrong?

Paige-  Matt leaves today.

Jimmy-  You two are still together?  (Hazel hits him.)

Paige-  Yes we’re still together.  But this long-distance relationship is terrible.  Every time he comes into town he's spending all of his time with that tramp Charlie.

Craig-  I sense major girl talk coming on.  Our cue to exit.

Jimmy-  Later.  (Craig and Jimmy leave.)

Hazel-  What are you going to do about?  What can you do about it?  He's going to help her out with the kid.  They're going to be together a lot.  Eventually one of them is going to realize how much the other person just fits them and...

Paige-  Not what I needed to hear.

Hazel-  I just don't want you to get hurt.

Paige-  Thanks for the concern hun, but I know what I'm in and the only person whose going to get hurt is Charlie.

Hazel-  What are you going to do?

Paige-  How do you feel about a little winter vacay?

Hazel-  I'm so in.



(Ellie is sitting outside when Marco walks towards her...)

Marco-  Hey.

Ellie-  What's with you?  You're looking a little rough.

Marco-  Yeah.  (He sits down.)

Ellie-  Midterms got you down?

Marco-  Nah.  El, I need to talk to you.

Ellie-  Yeah.  I need to talk to you too.

Marco-  Okay.  Go ahead.  I'm here to listen to you.  (He grabs her hand gently.  She quickly pulls away.)

Ellie-  You know that whole no secrets thing we agreed to?

Marco-  Yeah.  Totally.  Whatever it is, you can tell me.

Ellie-  I know.  And I need to tell you.  I do.  I really, really do.  It's just, I don't know how this is going to affect our friendship.

Marco-  Our friendship is rock solid, El.  You can tell me anything.  It's not going to change my opinion of you.

Ellie-  Really?

Marco-  Yeah.

Ellie-  I'm so glad you said that.

Marco-  What is it?

Ellie-  Marco, you're an amazing guy.  And, you've always been there for me.

Marco-  I try.

Ellie-  And, these past few weeks, you've been amazing.  Stepping up and helping me through my parent's divorce.  It's been really hard on me, and you've been the best.

Marco-  Thanks El.

Ellie-  It's just, Paige said something to me the other day, and it got me thinking about how I feel about certain things.  Things that I guess I've been repressing.  I don't know.  But, I've been thinking about it.  And...and things are starting to make a lot more sense. More sense then things have ever been.   

Marco-  Thinking's good.  It clears things up.

Ellie-  Yeah.  (She starts to tear up.)  I'm still in love with you.  (Marco looks shocked.)

Marco-  What?

Ellie-  I know it sounds crazy...

Marco-  When were you in love with me before?

Ellie-  I guess I always have been.  And, maybe it's just because I haven't had a boyfriend in so long or something, but, I can't imagine being with any guy but you.

Marco-  El, I'm gay.

Ellie-  I know.  (Tears start rolling down her face.)  And that's what's killing me.  I love you but you’re gay.  How am I suppose to deal with this?  I was right to tell you, right?  I mean, I had to tell you, right?

Marco-  I guess.

Ellie-  I just, I don't know how to deal.  Because I know nothing will ever happen, but deep down inside, I want something to.

Marco-  El...I...(He starts to tear up.)  I...What's going on?

Ellie-  Marco, don't freak out.  We can still be friends, right?

Marco-  Ellie, nothing is ever going to happen.  Ever.

Ellie-  I know.  And I keep telling myself that, but that doesn't stop how I feel.

Marco-  Just keep telling yourself that.  (He stands up.)

Ellie-  Where are you going?

Marco-  Class is about to start.

Ellie-  Don't avoid this Marco.  I invented "Class is about to start, I need to go."  We need to talk about this.

Marco-  El, you need to deal with your emotions, and you need to deal with them far away from me.  (He leaves.  Ellie is still sitting on the bench, crying.)


[In the hall...]

(Marco walks in and Paige sees him.  She walks over to him...)

Paige-  Hey.

Marco-  Please don't tell me you love me too.

Paige-  As a friend.  (Marco walks into a closet.  Paige follows him.)  You're still freaking out about Dylan, aren't you?

Marco-  (Crying.)  Dylan, my dad, Ellie.

Paige-  What?

Marco-  Dylan set off this whole chain of events.

Paige-  What?

Marco-  My dad heard everything.

Paige-  What?

Marco-  He knows.  (He sits down.)  He knows everything.  He knows I'm gay.  He knows that me and Dylan dated.  He knows and he's freaking out.

Paige-  What?

Marco-  Don't make me repeat.

Paige-  (She sits down next to him.)  How is he freaking out?

Marco-  He kicked me out.  He said that I'm not a man.  He told me that I'm not his son, and that I'm dead to him.

Paige-  (She grabs Marco's hand.)  Marco...

Marco-  He kicked me out.  All of my stuff is there.  I didn't have a chance to study.  He freaked.  All because of Dylan.

Paige-  He would have freaked without Dylan.  Whenever you told him, he would have freaked.

Marco-  What if I never told him?

Paige-  Yeah, live your whole life in the closet?  That's healthy.

Marco-  I wouldn't be in this situation though.

Paige-  But you'd be living a lie.

Marco-  What if I'm living a lie now?

Paige-  What?

Marco-  According to my dad, being gay is unnatural and I'm sick in the head.  What if that's true?

Paige-  Then one in ten men would be sick in the head.  Marco, will you listen to yourself?

Marco-  What if I just don't want to be with a woman because I'm afraid of love or something?  All I ever want is friendship or something and that's why I'm with guys.

Paige-  Where is this coming from?  Marco, you're gay.

Marco-  Am I?

Paige-  Yes.  Marco, your dad freaking out is natural.  It happened with Dylan.

Marco-  Please don't say his name.  He's hurt me once, and he's going to continue to hurt me for the rest of my life.

Paige-  Listen to you.  This isn't Marco Del Rossi.

Marco-  How do you know?

Paige-  Because the Marco Del Rossi I know is confident and sure of who he is.  He knows what he wants and he goes after it.  He's not afraid to do what he thinks is right.  Isn't your quote in the yearbook "If it feels good, do it"?

Marco-  What if I'm wrong?

Paige-  You're not wrong.  You're dad is a huge jerk and homophobic.  You're mom is okay with you being gay, right?

Marco-  Yeah.

Paige-  So, just because your dad is being weird doesn't mean its wrong. 

Marco-  (Crying harder.)  I just...I always wanted his approval, you know?  School president, straight a's.  Straight?  Not me.  No.  I'm gay.  (Pauses.)  I wanted him to be proud of me.  I want him to say, look at him, that's my boy.  Now he's ashamed.

Paige-  That's his problem.  (Marco shakes his head.)  Marco, you're amazing.  You don't deserve to be miserable like this.  You work ten times harder than anyone here.  You're a good person with an even better heart.  Just because your dad doesn't agree with one aspect of your life doesn't mean he's going to hate you forever.

Marco-  I don't want him to.  I want him to accept it.

Paige-  Then don't doubt yourself.  You're gay.  You're suppose to have pride, aren't you?

Marco-  Yeah.  (Paige hugs him.  Marco continues to cry.  Paige leans her head on to his.  The bell rings.)

Paige-  We should start heading to class.

Marco-  Yeah.  (They stand up.)  Thanks Paige.  You're my rock.

Paige-  You're mine.  (They hug.)

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