Emma slept on it, she told Craig that she really needed time to think, to clear her head. She woke up the next morning with a clearer understanding of the choice she had to make. It would be the hardest thing to do, but she had to do it for Craig because he deserved the best, and she didn’t believe that she was it.

She walked into the living room to find Craig still sleeping on the couch. He looks so peaceful, she thought. She decided that it would be best not to disturb him; it would be better that way. This way he couldn’t stop her, try to change her mind because if anyone could it would be him. She would write him a letter instead, and try to explain it the best she could.

Emma picked up a notepad and began to write her letter, and put the letter right on the table. She then went to kiss him on the forehead before heading out the door, “Good-bye Craig.”

She opened the door and glanced at him one last time, causing a tear to fall from her face. There would be no sweet kisses, no more text messages to say I love you, and no more endless talks on the phone. She was saying good-bye to it all, putting his needs for a family before what she wanted or needed.

******

Craig awoke from his sleep, he was lucky he had slept any bit through the night. He spent most of the night trying to think what it would be like if Emma was gone, no longer in his life, and it scared him. He needed her in his life; she made him happier than he ever thought was possible, especially after Kelsie. He worried that last night that she hadn’t believed him that he had stopped loving Kelsie.

He glanced across the room to notice an envelope sitting on the table. His heart dropped, he already new exactly what it was. No, this couldn’t be happening, he thought.

He got up from his couch, and strolled right over to the table to read it, even though he really didn’t want to.

Dear Craig,

I hate to leave town without telling you first, but you would only ask me to stay, and I know that I could never say no to you. I just believe that this is the best thing for the both of us.

I had to go, in my heart I know that it’s not right for me to be with you any longer for your heart doesn’t belong truly to me. It still longs for Kelsie, and I know you hate to admit it, but it does. I didn’t want to stand in the way of it anymore. I saw the way you kept looking at her; I wish it were the same way you looked at me. At first, I was blind to it, but I just couldn’t deny it any longer.

And I’m not saying that you didn’t love me at all or nothing. Please don’t think that; I know you did, I felt it. Its just it’s not the same kind of love that you should have for someone you want to spend the rest of you life with. I will always cherish the time we had together; you were my first of a lot of things. It’s just time for us to move our separate ways.

 I don’t know how Kelsie feels for you, I don’t know who she loves more, but promise me not to wait forever for her, find someone who is willing to give you their whole heart to you, and you to them. I thought that was me, but you for some reason just couldn’t give me it. Know that I will always love you, and that you were the first person that I could truly show my whole self to. I’m sorry that I couldn’t say good-bye properly.

With All My Love,

Emma

Every word that he read made him want to cry. He couldn’t believe that she thought that he didn’t truly love her, had she been blind to it? What was he going to do; he didn’t want to lose her. This wasn’t what he wanted at all.

Craig grabbed his keys from the kitchen counter; he had to catch her before it was too late, before she walked out of his life for good. He needed to stop her from making a total mistake; she needed to hear him out. This time with his own words, and not a song. He just prayed that there was still time.

******

Emma arrived at the airport, with tears in her eyes. She walked up to the front desk; she needed to change her ticket. “Hi, I would like to change my flight for next week, to today.”

“Your name miss.”

“Emma Nelson.”

She took a minute to look it over, “Yes you can, but the earliest I can get you a flight is at 4pm.”

Shaking her head, “That’s fine.” Emma strolled over to waiting area. This was going to be a long wait. She would be glad to get out of here, it would be so much easier to get over Craig when he wasn’t around, and she didn’t have to face him at all. She sat on a bench and stared at the picture of them from her wallet, they had been so happy. She tried not to cry, she had to be strong; this really was for the best, she kept repeating to herself.

******

Craig sped to the airport, he had to catch her, and stop her from leaving him. He needed her, in spite what she thought. He wasn’t going to lose another girl, he just couldn’t, he thought as tears ran down his cheek; not when she was his world.

Several things were running through his head that he didn’t pay too much attention to the way he was driving. There were cars honking, but it didn’t seem to faze him. He was in his own little world, where he couldn’t hear anything or see anything going on around him. He definitely wasn’t in the position to be driving, but that hadn’t stopped him from doing so.

That’s when it happened. He ran right through a red light onto the busy highway, the man coming right for him slammed on his brakes, but it was too late, he went right into Craig’s side of the car, crushing the car on one side. The car horn went off uncontrollably, unable to stop.

Craig hit his head against his side window, really hard, splitting it right open. He was knocked unconscious; his head landed on the steering wheel. He lay there, as blood trickled down his face, across his cheek, onto the steering wheel.

“Someone call 911,” some driver called out, as he ran to go see how the casualties were. He wasn’t sure how many there were; he only saw the accident from a far. However, by how the two vehicles looked now, he couldn’t wait until the professionals got there otherwise none would make it.

He rushed over to them; he went to the one that hit the other car first. He opened the door as wide as it would open, to find shattered glass all over the front seats of the car. He began to check him out, he was pretty beat up, cuts covered his face you couldn’t even see what his face actually looked like anymore. His chest wasn’t rising, no air was getting to his chest, he put his two fingers to his throat to check his pulse, but there was none. This one never had any chance, he thought.

He went to open up Craig’s car, but it was jammed because of the impact from the other car. How was he supposed to help him then? He noticed something on the passenger seat that seemed familiar; it was a stuffed animal, it looked like the one his daughter’s father had gotten for her, and yes it seemed to be the same type of car. He moved a little, hoping that he could see the guys face, but there was no luck. Yes, this guy had the same colour as him, but it couldn’t be him, he told himself; even though there were too many similarities to deny.

The paramedics had finally showed up after ten very long minutes, and ran towards him, “You need to move away from the scene.”

“I will, but the guy in that car is stuck in there, and the other victim is dead.”

“Thank you.”

He watched from a far as they jerked open the door. His heart sunk as he looked at the man they had retrieved from the vehicle. “Oh my God!!!” He grabbed his cell phone from his pocket, dialing Kelsie’s cell.

It took her a little while for her to answer, “Hey Hun,” there was so much joy in that voice, he didn’t know he would be able to break this to her. How do you tell your girlfriend that the father of her child had been in an accident and is in a serious condition?

“Hey, um I think you need to sit down.”

“Why, what’s wrong?” not liking the tone of her voice. Was he breaking up with her or something, doubting that was the case but you never know.

“I was driving along the highway towards Brennan’s place when there was an accident…”

She began to panic; “You’re okay though…right!” worried that he may have been involved.

“I’m fine, I wasn’t part of it,” he reassured her.

“Good, so then why are you telling me this then.”

“At first I wasn’t sure I knew one of the driver’s, but when they brought him out of the car, it was revealed that it was actually…Craig.” He wished he could have been there to tell her in person, so he could comfort her. He knew that she would be a wreck.

“What!” she felt like she couldn’t breathe. “What about Emma? She’s okay…right!” worried why he hadn’t mentioned anything about her, worried that she had been in the car too.

“She wasn’t in the car, he was alone.”

“Okay, you head to the hospital, and I’ll call Emma, and then we’ll meet you there.”

“Okay, I love you.”

“I love you too.” She hung up the phone, and began to prepare how she was going to Emma. She knew this would break her heart. She had to be strong, and hold it all together for Emma’s sake; she knew that she would need her to lean on.

******

Emma just sat in the waiting room; she wished that the time for boarding would be soon because she just wanted to get out of here, and be back home with her family. Her cell phone went off, and all of a sudden, she got a funny feeling in her stomach, and it wasn’t a good one, “Hello.”

“Emma, where are you? I tried calling Craig’s but you weren’t there.”

“Who is this?” she didn’t recognize the voice, or the number.

“Kelsie, where are you?” hearing that it sounded like there were a lot of people in the background.

“At the airport…I’m going home.”

Kelsie wanted to know why, but she didn’t have time for chitchat, “You can’t go home, you need to come with me to the hospital.”

“What, why?” why would she want her to come with her to the hospital, what was there?

“Well I’m guessing that Craig was coming to get you from the airport, and on his way got himself into an accident.”

She had to have heard her wrong. He was at home where he should be, a little upset but otherwise okay. She began to tremble, “No…no…no.”

“Meet me outside, and I’ll pick you up from there. From what Chris said he’s in critical condition.”

“Okay,” she answered as her voice shook. She hung up the phone, and began to blame herself for this all. Had she really been wrong about his feelings, was she really just trying to runaway? Craig had come all the way to stop her, only to get hurt. Tears ran down her face, as she just thought about it.

Emma’s whole body began to shake as the shock of it began to sink in. She felt like she couldn’t breathe, as if all the oxygen had been torn from her lungs. This wasn’t supposed to happen, he wasn’t supposed to run after her, he was supposed to accept it, and go for what he really wanted. She couldn’t get the feeling that this was her entire fault out of her head.

She slowly walked towards the exit with her bags in hand, to wait for Kelsie to pick her up. It was as if she was living in a nightmare. If Craig died, she wouldn’t ever forgive herself, and once people knew the whole story they would hate her, and blame her too.

Him being dead would not only mean that Joey and Angie would never see him again, but also most of all Ava would never get to know how great her father really was. And she knows exactly how it’s like to never know your real father.

Many things ran through her head as she there waiting. She waited about 30mins until Kelsie finally made it.

Kelsie got out of the SUV to open the trunk, she said, “Emma, I was glad I was able to contact you before you left.”

“So am I…I never meant for this to happen,” feeling like she could start crying again at any moment.

“I know, but why were you leaving?” trying to figure out, not knowing that Emma had been unhappy about something.

Emma took a deep breathe, she didn’t know if she really wanted to tell Kelsie that she thought Craig was still in love with her, and her vise versa. Here goes to her hating me, she thought, “Well I just feel you guys have this love for each other that I can’t compete with.”

“Why do you think that?” confused by this whole thing. She just didn’t understand where this was coming from.

“You two share this gift, a child, and…”

She didn’t even let her finish, “I love Chris, and besides people do that all the time, you guys can too when your ready.”

Emma stared out the car window, with a gloomy look on her face. If she only knew the half of it, no one knew, not even her mother. She didn’t want anyone to know about it, they would only feel sorry for her.

When Emma didn’t answer her, she looked over to notice look on her face. “What’s wrong?” When she still didn’t answer, “Can you please tell me?”

Maybe she would understand, she thought, and it would be good to get it out in the open. She had been bottling for a couple months now. “I…can’t have kids.” Something that haunted her; it hurt to know that she could never share the joy of having a child with her love.

“What?” astonished by the news she heard.

“Yeah, when I had a check up a few months back the doctor’s found that if I was to ever get pregnant, I would be putting myself in danger,” putting her face in her hands. It wasn’t fair, hadn’t she had enough problem?

“Does Craig know?”

As a tear rolled down her cheek, “No I didn’t have the heart to tell him. I mean I see how he adores Ava. If he stays with me he’s going to be without that.”

“You know the doctor’s don’t think that I can have any more kids, they say that the hemorrhaging may have caused too much damage in my uterus.”

“Really?”

Shaking her head, “Yeah…so is that the real reason you let go of him?”

“Yes…I saw you two together, and how you bonded over Ava. All I could think is how we would never be able to share that bond. I felt the only way he was going to find that with another would be to let him go.”

“Em…from what I see he’s not yet willing to let you out of his life so easily,” trying to convince her. She knew what it was like not to want to let go the love of her life. That’s why she had to let Craig go.

“What if he doesn’t make it?” she asked, crying hysterically.

“You can’t think like that, we need to be positive.” And when he woke up she would use all of her power to make sure that these two would have a happy ending. That Emma wouldn’t run away from him any longer. She knew that Craig wouldn’t care if she couldn’t have kids, he just wanted to be with her; in the end they could always adopt.